It's worth noting that I almost left my husband about two years ago for the exact same reasons I'm thinking about now. I know that should tell me exactly what I need to do, but I'm still scared. Doubtful. Cowardly, even.
I know I can't have it both ways. I want to be with the man I've fallen for, but I'm scared that I won't be able to work up the courage to leave. It makes me sick thinking about it. Confrontation is not a thing I enjoy and I'm terrible at it. Last time I tried to leave, he cried and begged, so I stayed. I feel weak for giving in to that and I'm worried I'll be just as weak again.
It would be easier if I didn't love him at all.
10:42 a.m. - 2014-04-11